After my last blog, I thought of a way to rebut what the other woman has mentioned. I asked a friend of mine to put her shoes on the perspective of the chosen one. I asked her how she would react if she found out his man was cheating on him with another woman. This was her thoughts; I added parts of it because I know that I am going to be in a mess if I found out my man prefers the companion of a woman he has just met. Ladies, we have the right to be angry, bitter or even in a wreck havoc but we should always choose to be the better person. I know this open letter sounds or may look hypocritical or even surreal because it is a part of human nature to react hysterically to situations such as this. But with the amount of decency left in me and thinking I am more educated, I tried my best to react as chill as possible. I know some of you may disagree and react negatively but knowing I'm the better person, I tried my best to become more careful with the words that may pierced through the other woman. Careful but striking.
The response of the chosen one to the other woman.
Dear Other Woman,
The response of the chosen one to the other woman.
Dear Other Woman,
Three things.
I am hurt.
I am betrayed.
And yet, he chose me.
Just so you know, I am really unhappy. No one, in the right mind, would be happy knowing that the person you loved for years has been taken away in a matter of months. He was complacent that no matter what happens, we will never break up. I was on the verge of breaking up with him but he begged me to stay. He did.
I had him first...I have him, now. Even after all the exchange of words that made my heart shattered, I have him. Even after the dates you have been through, I have him. Even after he caused me pain, I have him.
I was not a perfect partner and I foresaw everything. Right in front of me, I know he was already cheating. I lost him. For a while. He lost us. I lost myself, too. I lost the idea of us. Everything was plain and simple, our plans for the future, our endeavors, those were laid in front of us until you came and put us in a loophole. We have been together for years now and I don't know whether it was your charm or magic potions or just you being you that made him set his foot back. Yes, my dear, he is falling for you. He does not look at me the way he did before. His eyes weren't as sparkling as the way he used to look at me; his arms, those arms that were so caressing, full of warmth turned into a cold wire embracing the wholeness of me, it was a lot of pain. Those kisses were stiff, it wasn't the same kisses I was receiving before. Everything became unusual. It was the kind of affection that I asked, it wasn't an initiative. I know that there's something going on but because I love him, I ignored it thinking he was only tired, thinking he was only preoccupied by work, thinking that he has reasons I know not. I was giving him the benefit of the doubt but my, it wasn't a mistake when I found him smiling over a phone call, that smile I never received whenever I hold him.
Our love story is the kind where we used to be each other's home. You know what I felt? I was scared because in front of me, I see my home starting to wreck. We used to fight over petty things like forgotten video and voice calls, lost photos to send, missed food intake, and even the last person to put the call down. Distance was never an issue for the both of us; we have this idea that it will make us stronger and prove ourselves worthy of each other despite our differences. We never fight over trust actually we never questioned each other's loyalty yet everything changed when you came.
The distance we have is a challenge we try to overcome every single day. I am trying so hard to ponder why he did it. I was clouded with questions of why's and how's because even in my dreams, it was unfathomable that our years of being together could still be distracted with just one person whom he met a few months back...easily. What's with you?
I asked him to stand clear of me. I told him to choose you over me. Why? Because we already have a vast distance between us. As much as I wanted him to stay, you are holding him back. Looking back, we have been through a lot. From accepting our differences to choosing to stay. We have fought a fight that I thought would help us choose each other no matter how big or small the feats may be. But I was wrong. You held him captive and he chose you for a while.
And before I lose my respect for him and for you, I am asking him to let me go. I am asking him to depart from my way not because I don't love him but I can't bear to look at him knowing I was looking at his mistake with you. I wanted to move forward but he chose to stay. Begging isn't part of love but he chose to let go of his ego and confided to me. He made a mistake. I know. But we are an imperfect couple who made wrong decisions sometimes.
Some may say that I am a martyr for choosing him still, you can actually say I am stupid. But you can say whatever you want and we will choose each other no matter how impertinent people like you can be. Despite the flaws, we are better than the mistakes we made in the past. And anyway, you are in the past.
He promised he'll stay. I am keeping his word. It's up to him whether to break it or not. Our relationship may not be as thrilling as what you had but ours is right. Our love story has ingredients that turned into bitter and spicy because of you but with the right amount of forgiveness and acceptance and humility, it went back to the balance of all the prime flavors of a dish not everyone can have.
Of all the mistakes he did, trust me, I was threatened by this one. But I guess, my love for him is greater than my fears. For what I know, we all deserve to love and to be loved. Cliche it may seem, but I know you are deserving of love. The right man will come along to prove your right of being loved. My man has me, please, not him. He has given you time, attention, companion but in the end, he will not choose you, never. How am I sure? It's trust and he could've chosen you over me a long time but he didn't. Complacency? Nah. Assurance it is.
You know how I feel towards you? I feel sad for you. It must've been sad being you. No friends, no one to talk to, no special someone you can confide on, you're alone. I pity you for being like that. Actually, I could choose to become so vulgar to you but I won't. I won't waste my time and my energy for things like this. I chose to forgive you because I deserve peace. I deserve relaxation of trust without the paranoia of betrayal. I am giving my man the chance to work it out between us because I believe he deserves it.
To you, the other woman, what has become of you to do this? Where have you put your conscience? How are you going to love someone when you haven't been healed yourself?
Just an unsolicited advice, I know it hurts like hell to be left alone and have your heart broken, but don't use your apparent heartache as an excuse to hurt others who are happy in the relationship they are in.
Sooner or later, you'll meet the man of your dreams, the man whose attention, time, company won't falter. He may not be as captivating as the way you saw my man, but you'll be in love again and this time, it will stay. You have chosen the wrong person to love this time. I know it is not wrong to love but the person you loved is committed. Both of you committed a mistake against me but that doesn't make you or him a bad person. All of us have the capability to love another but he's another's. This may not be your time to be in cloud nine but you'll get there sooner or later, that's for sure.
P.S. I forgive you.
Respectfully yours,
The Chosen One
I had him first...I have him, now. Even after all the exchange of words that made my heart shattered, I have him. Even after the dates you have been through, I have him. Even after he caused me pain, I have him.
I was not a perfect partner and I foresaw everything. Right in front of me, I know he was already cheating. I lost him. For a while. He lost us. I lost myself, too. I lost the idea of us. Everything was plain and simple, our plans for the future, our endeavors, those were laid in front of us until you came and put us in a loophole. We have been together for years now and I don't know whether it was your charm or magic potions or just you being you that made him set his foot back. Yes, my dear, he is falling for you. He does not look at me the way he did before. His eyes weren't as sparkling as the way he used to look at me; his arms, those arms that were so caressing, full of warmth turned into a cold wire embracing the wholeness of me, it was a lot of pain. Those kisses were stiff, it wasn't the same kisses I was receiving before. Everything became unusual. It was the kind of affection that I asked, it wasn't an initiative. I know that there's something going on but because I love him, I ignored it thinking he was only tired, thinking he was only preoccupied by work, thinking that he has reasons I know not. I was giving him the benefit of the doubt but my, it wasn't a mistake when I found him smiling over a phone call, that smile I never received whenever I hold him.
Our love story is the kind where we used to be each other's home. You know what I felt? I was scared because in front of me, I see my home starting to wreck. We used to fight over petty things like forgotten video and voice calls, lost photos to send, missed food intake, and even the last person to put the call down. Distance was never an issue for the both of us; we have this idea that it will make us stronger and prove ourselves worthy of each other despite our differences. We never fight over trust actually we never questioned each other's loyalty yet everything changed when you came.
The distance we have is a challenge we try to overcome every single day. I am trying so hard to ponder why he did it. I was clouded with questions of why's and how's because even in my dreams, it was unfathomable that our years of being together could still be distracted with just one person whom he met a few months back...easily. What's with you?
I asked him to stand clear of me. I told him to choose you over me. Why? Because we already have a vast distance between us. As much as I wanted him to stay, you are holding him back. Looking back, we have been through a lot. From accepting our differences to choosing to stay. We have fought a fight that I thought would help us choose each other no matter how big or small the feats may be. But I was wrong. You held him captive and he chose you for a while.
And before I lose my respect for him and for you, I am asking him to let me go. I am asking him to depart from my way not because I don't love him but I can't bear to look at him knowing I was looking at his mistake with you. I wanted to move forward but he chose to stay. Begging isn't part of love but he chose to let go of his ego and confided to me. He made a mistake. I know. But we are an imperfect couple who made wrong decisions sometimes.
Some may say that I am a martyr for choosing him still, you can actually say I am stupid. But you can say whatever you want and we will choose each other no matter how impertinent people like you can be. Despite the flaws, we are better than the mistakes we made in the past. And anyway, you are in the past.
He promised he'll stay. I am keeping his word. It's up to him whether to break it or not. Our relationship may not be as thrilling as what you had but ours is right. Our love story has ingredients that turned into bitter and spicy because of you but with the right amount of forgiveness and acceptance and humility, it went back to the balance of all the prime flavors of a dish not everyone can have.
Of all the mistakes he did, trust me, I was threatened by this one. But I guess, my love for him is greater than my fears. For what I know, we all deserve to love and to be loved. Cliche it may seem, but I know you are deserving of love. The right man will come along to prove your right of being loved. My man has me, please, not him. He has given you time, attention, companion but in the end, he will not choose you, never. How am I sure? It's trust and he could've chosen you over me a long time but he didn't. Complacency? Nah. Assurance it is.
You know how I feel towards you? I feel sad for you. It must've been sad being you. No friends, no one to talk to, no special someone you can confide on, you're alone. I pity you for being like that. Actually, I could choose to become so vulgar to you but I won't. I won't waste my time and my energy for things like this. I chose to forgive you because I deserve peace. I deserve relaxation of trust without the paranoia of betrayal. I am giving my man the chance to work it out between us because I believe he deserves it.
To you, the other woman, what has become of you to do this? Where have you put your conscience? How are you going to love someone when you haven't been healed yourself?
Just an unsolicited advice, I know it hurts like hell to be left alone and have your heart broken, but don't use your apparent heartache as an excuse to hurt others who are happy in the relationship they are in.
Sooner or later, you'll meet the man of your dreams, the man whose attention, time, company won't falter. He may not be as captivating as the way you saw my man, but you'll be in love again and this time, it will stay. You have chosen the wrong person to love this time. I know it is not wrong to love but the person you loved is committed. Both of you committed a mistake against me but that doesn't make you or him a bad person. All of us have the capability to love another but he's another's. This may not be your time to be in cloud nine but you'll get there sooner or later, that's for sure.
P.S. I forgive you.
Respectfully yours,
The Chosen One
Always,
Jhara
xoxo
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