On Given Another Chance to Stay

A milestone I wanna share with everyone is that I get to stay in Singapore! I was about to lose hope because I was about to go back to my country. I mean don't get me wrong. I love the Philippines but Singapore offered me a better life, a greener pasture which is why I opted to stay here to work. But good times don't last, I experienced a backlash when I lost my job. Imagine?! My former company didn't manage to increase its standards of salary to declare in the Ministry of Manpower (MOM) or our version of DOLE here. They did try to renew me but failed. I cannot blame them because it is a member of SME (Small-Medium Enterprises) so maybe that's the reason why my renewal got rejected. hehe. And even though I was receiving a lot lesser from what they have declared in the MOM, I did not complain because maybe they will increase in the years to come but sadly, upon my first renewal in 2019, my salary was still low despite the amount declared in MOM. I did speak to them and they increased when I got promoted ot Assistant Supervisor but still lower than what they declared in MOM. I signed a bond and it was really scary and oh, it wasn't just a bond I signed but a Letter of Undertaking, a lot of things they wanted me to sign that if I opened up about the topic of salary again - any legal obligation, I will need to bear. I thought signing it would mean I get to keep my job but oops! I was wrong. A lot of negativities occured, a lot of realisations barged in. So, I stood up and accepted the fact that it's just not meant to be.

Last day was on the day I have already forgotten, but the last day of my pass' validity was on the 25th July and I got informed via email that it will be on the 23rd July instead so I have to go back in a month's time which is 22nd August. The best decision I took was not to allow my former company to purchase the plane ticket for me. I called the MOM and they said that it's nay company's responsibility to be the one to buy tickets for their repatriated employee.

I think God really wants me to stay here because He moved mountains for me. After I got retrenched, I immediately received calls for interviews and callbacks! It was really a proud moment for me because I was losing hope already. One company stood out from the rest and it was YMCA! I really thank God that this company came at the perfect moment. The company applied for my pass on 11th August and it was approved on the 19th August. Yes! I cried. It was tears of joy. It was the highlight of my 2021. I purchased my ticket already but gladly, it was refunded. God is really faithful on His promises. 

YMCA of Singapore is a huge company and I am now working as a Senior Mentor here. Their HQ is really knowledgeable on their job scope and everything in the contract is followed including the salary. I can honestly say that God will ask you to wait for His perfect time but He will not leave you behind. He will just ask you to enjoy the waiting process. Fret not for He is going to allow you to reap what you sow.

So Long, Singapore!

 So I guess, this is finally it! My last couple of weeks in Singapore.

This blog post is dedicated to Singapore - my second home. I set foot in Singapore for the first time on 9th July 2014. Who would've thought that I will step onto the soil of Singapore to compete in a singing competition? It all started as a dream. Ever since I was young, I always dreamt of coming to the Lion City just to see the Merlion. My influencer? My godfather. He showed me a lot of photos and attractions with the then-not so established city and from there, the dream of coming here was on top of my bucket list. I really worked my arse off to be able to afford a plane ticket as some who went here said it was quite expensive to live and breathe here. A lot of hearsays did not discourage me from following my dream. The first oportunity knocked on my door when I was a part of a choral group in college - (shoutout!) University of Batangas Chorale. This group is the first choral group in my province to compete in the international stage. We vied a lot of competitions just to get ourselves ready for the standards of the international choral scene and we did not fail! We won the silver diplomas on the 3 categories we joined. Guess what?! It was my Godfather who sponsored everything for me - from the plane ticket to the ppocket money. It was all expenses paid! That was my first aeroplane ride and I couldn't hide both my excitement and nervousness. That was my first time to experience turbulence so it was really scary for me but hey, there's always a room for first timers right? After this experience, Singapore never went off my mind anymore. Fast forward to 2017, I was just a dreamer who told myself I would work hard to achieve the things that I want. God heard this prayer and my then-boyfriend's relatives helped me to stay in Singapore for a month to hunt for jobs. Yes! I came here using my STVP or short-term visit pass. This pass allows anyone to stay in Singapore legally for 30 days and just before it ended, I was able to find a job. Kowabunga! Global Pte. Ltd. accepted me here in Singapore and I worked for them for 3 years and 10 months. Not all happy beginnings will stay that happy because due to the strict MOM guidelines now, I was not able to meet the requirement and so I had to say bye bye to the company to my kids. I started as a Student Care Teacher until Nov 2020 and got promoted into an Assistant Supervisor. The growth that I have is coupled with hardships, endurance-test and a lot of breaking, but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger (by Kelly Clarkson). It was not easy to be in this position, it took me years to endure everything and thank God because my parents taught me to persistent and resilient come what may.

Singapore will always have a special place in my heart. I will always come back to this paradise. I would like to thank my housemates in 296D and in Regent Grove for allowing me to be who I am, for seeing the good in me despite of and in spite of. My rollercoster ride in Singapore will not be a smooth sail without these beautiful people. This is not good bye but rather, I'll see you soon.

Until then,

Jhara

In Solitude, I Found Me | A Word for People Who Feel Alone

I was that kind of person who was never confident being alone. I couldn't stand the idea of running errands all by myself, enjoying down time or just plain live. I feel like people are lurking at me, judging me that I, although nothing's wrong, don't deserve to have a companion.

As I grow older, I realized that it is important to recognize your worth and explore your fullest potential with or without someone. I remember when I had my heart broken, I had the notion of not being able to get back up again because I was too broken, shattered rather. I was (too) dependent to my former flames (doing groceries, eating, etc.) and trust me, it's very wrong. It was the me I am never going back. That's why when they left, I didn't know what to do. I was scared. I always asked myself what went wrong, what did I do wrong, am I dispensable that easily or was I just a cigarette break to them only to realize I allowed things to happen...I allowed them to put out the fire that was there at the beginning of our relationship, I allowed drama. Setting aside my pride, I usually took over the drama my relationship had so the sympathy was gained victoriously. 

It took me courage and a lot of leaps in order to attain what I do best - love life. I indulged myself to a series of misfortunes before I valiantly enjoy the realness and rawness of life. I grieved so much when I was alone. I wasn't as confident as I am now. I was in a constant battle between should I and should I not. There were more doubts than taking the leap of faith. The fear of the beyond, the fear of not being being good enough and the fear of being alone recklessly haunted me from time to time but as soon as I began to love myself more, not giving a damn to what people say, I began to feel okay. 

In solitude, I found me. I found me staying strong day by day. The process blazed up because I chose me. I chose me despite the rough patches I needed to go through. I chose me when people hated on me, despised me, bullied me, turned their backs on me. I chose me when I had no one. I chose me when I almost gave up on life. And by choosing me, I realized it was not wrong at all. Your self-worth triples when you choose yourself over anything and it's not being self-absorbed, it is loving yourself, the kind of love that was not reciprocated to you; it is the kind of love that will stay and grow further if you chose to. Given the timing of everything, at first I couldn't understand the whys that were left unanswered yet as days went by, I held onto that promise that God mentioned that in His time, he will make everything beautiful (Ecclesiastes 3:11).

And to you who's reading this, hang in there. You'll find you-- happy, loved, resilient and courageous...and you won't feel alone. Hang in there!

Always,

Jhara

xoxo